Thursday, June 6, 2013

Growing up to be "that" kind of woman...

When I was a little girl, I wanted to be so many different things.

A doctor, a teacher, a dancer, pianist (I played the piano for a short time), a lawyer (people said I would be a good lawyer because I could talk for days)...I am sure there are many more my mom could tell you that I have already forgotten.

But today I remember my childhood aspirations because today my little K completed the 2nd grade and in a couple short months will be a 3rd grader. Daily she tells us all the different things she wants to be when she grows up...some make me laugh others blow me away. This girl is ready to do it all! She is ready to fight crime and give people a beautiful smile at the same time! And with each day that she shares more and more, I can't believe how fast she is growing in front of my very eyes. And while I want her to reach her dreams of being a teacher, a dentist, a police officer, and whatever she decides to do tomorrow, what I really want for her is to have is a deep love in her heart. I want her to have God's love so deeply embedded in her that she can't contain it. I want her to know the peace He will give her when she reaches hard times in her life. I want her to know that no matter the heart-breaks, disappointments or worries that this world can bring, that she will always be loved. I want her to be strong in her faith and grow up to be a woman that knows she can achieve anything because she has God on her side. I want her to experience the deep satisfaction on He can give us.

I want all of this for me too. I want to grow up to be this woman too. So badly.

...and during my runs too!

I love this saying. I love the intensity, the power, the intimidation it carries. I want to be a fierce woman for God. I need to be. I need to live this each day for myself, for my little K (and all my future foster baby girls) and for my husband. It gives me so much confidence knowing my husband is strong in his faith and in his walk. Knowing that every day he is intentionally "taking" God with him everywhere. He deserves to feel the same about his wife. 

Goals for this moment in my life:
  • Be real. By this, I don't mean to imply I am a "fake" person...not at all. I think one of my good qualities is that I am a genuine person...sometime a bit too genuine. But to be real I mean to be me, just me. Not worker-me. Not planner-me. Not problem-solver-me. Just me. Raw. As if there was no work, or planning, or problem-solving to be done. Who would I be?...that's the me I need to be more often...she has come out a few times these last few weeks and I like seeing her. I think my family likes her too. 
  • Be vulnerable. With my husband and kids. Allow them to impact me. To shake my world. With God's word. For it to bury itself deep inside me in a soft and tender spot so I never forget that its there. 
  • Enjoy the path I'm on. I need to look around more while I walk this path. I need to stop looking ahead to the end of the road and start looking to my right and left and see those who are walking with me and see the path we are on. Sometimes smooth. Sometimes bumpy. Windy. Uphill. Downhill. Walking a dry desert or a lush garden. I need to look around. 
  • Love. Love. Love. Love. Love. Praise. Praise. Praise. Praise. Praise. Rejoice. Rejoice. Rejoice. Rejoice.  Love some more. 
  • Read. Read my Bible. Read the 10 books sitting on top, on the side, inside my nightstand. Just read.
  • Cut myself some slack every once and a while. 
  • Show unconditional and endless love and support to everyone around me. EVERYONE!
  • Allow myself to experience God. All those things I want for my little K, I need to allow time for myself to feel, live, breathe all of that daily.

Today was suppose to be a kettlebell day. But instead I spent it with my monkeys. I will make up for it tomorrow...promise :) I just decided to cut myself a little slack today.

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  1. You might not be a doctor, or an astronaut but you are an amazing wife, a great mom to 'K' and an outstanding employee to your employer. I am so proud of you and I know God is working in our lives shaping us and molding us to His perfect will and His image. I love you and keep up the great work.

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